i’m reading a Selected Poems of Zbigniew Herbert

he has a poem ‘Sister’ that speaks of becoming her, and also another switch of identity later

now, i’m not even looking at this in any trans point of view either, just a child’s exploration – an understanding Gran in some way too is mentioned

But, what it made me think, from this, then at a huge tangent that grows and melds into many others — is of a great unwritten volume of the understanding of humanity for humanity and for other things, beings, plants, other other, especially when it is not confused by all the things it/we/i think i know and have been told are so and that i do

such as the understanding of this Gran to whatever he was playing with

so many of these understandings research throws back at us later, proven and fixed (which may confuse further, when we meet what’s not quite it) – and yet in these acts all understandings of all the research may be implied, made real, may even be explicit and living for the discoverers,  wider, royal and breathing, whether found by subject or object in the business

not a few may have thought ‘oh I must write that down’

and how many in their living wisdom have been taught ‘better’ and made small

i want to go out and walk quiet tracks, find these trees that grow like this, grow towards some great trunk river – it cannot be undisturbed, but assert it so its never hidden, deep down, even when it is

what perhaps sits in all of this, it’s hit me now, is love

do we need a new history, synthesis, what is so often dismissed, humanity’s successes, risk that is no risk, when just allowed to grow